How a Perspective Shift Saved My Mental Health: One Story of Burnout, Boundaries, and Breakthrough
Over the years, many things have negatively impacted my life, and in the midst of those experiences, it often felt never ending. These moments triggered negative and intrusive thoughts. They affected my mood, sleep, relationships, physical health, emotions, behaviors, and self-esteem. I felt stuck and unsure of how to free myself. Looking back, I now realize that what helped me get unstuck was a shift in perspective.
Let me share a past work experience. The place I worked held deep meaning for me, a place where I created beautiful memories and found support during some of the darkest times in my life. I had no desire to leave. I wanted to give back, just as it had given to me. Thankfully, I didn’t have to be away long. I was able to return not long after leaving.
My first couple of years back were everything I hoped for. It felt like home. I continued learning, growing, creating meaningful memories, and giving back in fulfilling ways. But over time, changes were made. Respected leaders left, and new people arrived. My responsibilities increased without compensation, and I began to feel unappreciated. Because of personal circumstances and the relationships I had built, I felt like I had to stay.
To support myself financially and rebuild my self-esteem, I took on a second job and began volunteering in an area I loved. As you can imagine, balancing a full-time job, a part-time job, and volunteer work quickly became exhausting. Still, I felt I had no choice. The second job helped me stay afloat financially, and the volunteer work brought me joy. I lived this way for four years.
Eventually, I realized that something had to change or this would become my life. I stopped volunteering and decided to go back to school for my master’s degree. That decision came at a cost. My physical and mental health began to suffer. Yet again, I felt I had no choice. I needed both jobs to cover doctor bills and treatment, and I couldn’t quit school if I wanted a better future.
Meanwhile, my full-time job continued to feel suffocating. Still, it paid my bills, provided insurance, and helped with school. How could I leave a job that supported me in so many ways? But then again, how could I stay in a place that caused me so much internal strife?
Eventually, I completed my master’s degree and left both my full-time and part-time jobs for something new, something I believed I would love (and I do). I made a promise to myself that I would never again let a job have so much power over me.
I share this experience because I can now reflect on it with clarity. I see how my perspective shaped the decisions I made, decisions that affected my physical and mental well-being. Today, when I feel stuck, when negative or intrusive thoughts return, or when my health is affected, I remind myself that I have the power to view my situation from multiple perspectives.
We all have a default perspective, and that default is tied to our core beliefs. For example, during that time in my life, I believed I didn’t deserve more unless I worked more, a belief shaped by my upbringing. Unfortunately, in that situation, doing more didn’t lead others to see my worth. It led them to expect more without offering compensation.
By giving myself alternative perspectives, I now choose ones that are healthier for me. It isn’t easy to override a default mindset, but the more we practice choosing a healthier outlook, the easier it becomes. Over time, even our default beliefs can begin to shift.
A perspective shift has helped me in many areas of life including career, family, relationships, and friendships. It’s helped me reduce obsessive behaviors, confront controlling fears, and see myself in a new light. It’s given me a stronger voice that speaks up for me in healthy ways.
I’ll leave you with a phrase I say to myself often, if not daily:
Here’s to growth, healing, change, and a calm mind and body.
Ready to Begin Your Journey?
If Brad's story resonates with you and you're seeking support on your path to healing, the team at Halos Counseling is here to help. Whether you're navigating burnout, seeking personal growth, or facing life's challenges, our compassionate therapists are committed to walking alongside you. Reach out today to schedule an appointment and take the first step toward a more balanced and fulfilling life.
About the Author
Brad Vaughn, M.A., LCMHC, is a dedicated mental health therapist at Halos Counseling, serving adolescents, adults, and couples. With a compassionate and personalized approach, Brad integrates solution-focused, narrative, cognitive-behavioral, and person-centered therapies to empower clients on their journey toward self-awareness and personal growth.His expertise spans areas such as anxiety, depression, trauma, and life transitions, aiming to create a safe space for healing and transformation.